What Do the Olympics, iPads and Parenting have in Common?

More than you might think!  An iPad, the Olympics, Gabby Douglas and parenting really do have a common thread.

iPads

 

On the eve of her iPad acquisition.

Big G got her iPad last Friday.  You might recall that we told her she could get one if she earned $400 toward it. And we would then pay the balance.  

 

I honestly thought it would 1) deter her or 2) take 8-10 months to accomplish.

She earned it in a little over 4 months.  $400.  And she's 10 years old.

She hoarded her allowance money, only spending it on her monthly subscription to Moshi Monsters.  

 

She didn't spend 1 dime of her birthday money.  

And when we projected how long it would take her to reach her goal just by doing those things, she decided that wasn't soon enough.  

So she asked me what she could do to earn more. 

I made a list of shit jobs around the house and attached a dollar value to them.  She earned about $5 extra a week doing those jobs and voila!  

iPad money earned.

So off we went on Friday, with her cash in an envelope marked, creatively, "iPad."

And this is how it shook out:  

She paid for the iPad and tax.  Mom and Dad bought the protective cover, protective case, and two year protective insurance for it.  

See a theme there?  

Read on. 

Olympics

I watch the Olympics nightly.  Often the kids watch too.  (Like Katie Hurley recently wrote - breaking technology rules is well worth it for something like the Olympics).  

And I watch these young kids who have sacrificed so much to achieve their dreams, sacrifices you certainly don't see as they're going for the glory of a medal.  

And I watch their parents in the stands, sometimes cheering, sometimes stoic, sometimes sobbing when they watch their kids from the sidelines.

And as much as I love the kids and  watching their success, I'm obssessed with the parents.

What have the parents sacrificed to help their kids reach these dreams?  

What are the parents doing quietly, behind the scenes, to make sure everything that's going on on the the floor, in the pool, on the field, or on the track happens seamlessly?

And if I look at our experience with the iPad, I'm guessing those parents are doing a helluva lot

Parenting

Because parenting?  It's not a front and center sport.  It's not a glory seeking job.  When done right, it's a job that's done almost entirely behind the scenes.

So with Big G's iPad, she did the work of earning the money, but we did the work of making sure her hard-earned purchase isn't ruined by still-clumsy 10 year old hands.  

We've ensured the behind the scenes protections, while she gets to enjoy the fruits of her labor.  

And we'll have to continue to do quiet, behind the scenes work to make sure she doesn't go too far with it or get hurt by things she doesn't understand yet.  (Like Facetime, for example).

And with the Olympics?  It's the same.  

These parents I watch sitting in the stands, getting little or no glory  - that's the way it's supposed to be.  

They made the behind the scenes sacrifices for their kids' dreams.  Sometimes monumental, unheard of sacrifices, really.  

But their kids get every bit of the glory down below.  Because they've put in the work to get there too.  And their work - that's the work that makes headlines.

And that's as it should be.  That's the nature of the parent child relationship.

And this iPad purchase in our house?  It might be my favorite thing from our Old-Fashioined summer.  

Because it represents hard work, sacrifice, delayed gratification and goal reaching.  

Lessons I hope I'm imparting as a parent.  

And maybe I am after all.

Comments

[dylan lin calista]

My brother and I didn't get a lot 'for free' - even such things as Candy bars, we had to work for (i.e. clean something).

It was good though because the experience taught us the value of hard work and how hard it is to earn money. (Money doesn't grow on trees so quit asking Mom for this and that.)

By the way, I've chosen your blog as my top 15 picks for the Versatile Blogger Award.
http://www.lifegasmic.com/life/the-versatile-blogger-award/

[Katie E]

I'm so impressed she did it - and now I'm wondering if I should offer my girls something similar. They always say they're going to save their money for something big, but they never do it (and their current allowances go towards Moshi Monsters and Fantage). And you're totally right about so much of parenting being behind the scenes efforts - loved this post!

[angela]

You are amazing, and so is your daughter. I love this comparison.

[Theanecdotalbaby.blogspot.com]

I love this post for so many reasons: first, I think instilling a work ethic in your child is wonderful. Secondly, I love how you described the parent-child relationship. We do so much for our kids to realize their own successes without receiving any public glory (like you said, as it should be) but the satisfaction of raising great humans is what you see when you watch those parents weep on the sidelines, cheer with joy, or remain stoic in anticipation. And I think that only adds to the lessons you ARE teaching: not always does one achieve fame or glory, but the inside satisfaction can be just as awesome.

[Laura Wells]

Great lessons you are teaching your daughter. Your post reminds me of the P &G commercials called thank you mom. Eventually all that we do as moms will be behind the scenes. And that is as it should be.

[Jennifer]

At my wedding I had a song dedicated to my mother, Wind Beneath My Wings, because that's what she was. And that's what I am to my kids. We lift them up so they can climb on mountains.

[Tinne from Tantrums and Tomatoes]

Well done Big G!
And well done to your for another stellar post. And I must admit I kind of break the tv-rules for the Olympics too... my kids just adore the gymnasts.

[DaddyRunsALot]

Missy, I couldn't agree with you more -- it's wonderful to see the parents sitting in the stands . . . I can only imagine all of the work that they had to do.

The only thing that got me was very, very loud parents of one of the gymnasts . . . it was obvious that they knew their daughter's routine, inside & out (good thing), and they wanted her to do well (great thing), but they were yelling.

A lot.

And I couldn't help but think of the kid whose father yelled at him from the stands any time he missed a free throw. Because, sometimes, parents have a hard time not making it about them . . . not saying these parents were like that, and most, well, it's a quiet sense of price that fuels them, and that's a beautiful thing. But, every now & then, the parent ties the child's performance to them, and it turns ugly . . . it sucks to see it in real life.

[Jody Brettkelly]

Good on her for her achievement - she really earned that! And how happy does she look too, what a cutie pie!

[Betsy/Zen Mama]

Congratulations! A huge accomplishment for your daughter... and for you and your husband. I've been there with the Xbox with my two oldest boys! They worked together and won a cash prize for a magazine contest so that they could get the video game box that I didn't want in our house. They were 12 and 14. But what is better than the two of them working together and earning all that money. It was worth it! They never played it too much because it wasn't part of our life. So I didn't have to make rules. But the best part, they know they can do anything!! This summer they lived together in their college town and paid all their rent and bills, plus have fun money left over. They are now 19 and 21. And it all started with that xbox! It's what you want for your kids... independence!! Woohoo!!!!

[Emily Y]

I clearly don't have a ten-year-old, since I have no idea what Moshi Monsters is! But I love this article, and the parallels you draw. I felt so bad for Aly Raisman's parents and the media coverage they got for being so animated about their daughter's performance. All I could think of was how crazy and nervous I would look if I had made all those sacrifices for my child to be out there performing in the Olympics.

[Jester Queen]

I'm SO excited for your daughter. Caroline is starting to really ask for one. She has a serious technology addiction, and I won't be even willing to let her earn it for a couple of more years (but then, she's also only 8 right now and your daughter is exactly the right age). But when Caroline gets old enough, I think she'll want to do something similar to earn her own.

[Mary @ A Teachable Mom]

Your daughter is amazing! Will she come mentor my newly turned 9 year old? I completely agree with your take on the parent/child relationship - no glory, lots of sacrifice, boundary setting - and the gift of these amazing children. You're a wonderful mom - will you come mentor me? Great post!

[Spincycleblog]

Yay, Big G! Girl, you earned that thang! And yay, Mom for teaching your big girl a valuable lesson on goal setting and fiscal responsibility.

[Ilene, The Fierce Diva Guide to Life]

I am so impressed that your daughter raised the money for her iPad - and with such fierce determination! She is a force - and is fortunate enough to have the "behind the scenes" crew that she has - because everyone has to work together to raise a child as well as an Olympian.

[The Mommist]

Awesome analogy! Good Job Big G! Great parenting skill Missy! This is a very important lesson that will shape a future great. I do this with my kids as well. Behind every great person (athlete, lawyer, doctor, etc.) is a parent who helped made him/her that way.